Encounters

I've bumped into just a small handful of Mormons since leaving the church. The Mormon population in Perth, Western Australia is pretty negligible so I can get around without too many unpleasant reminders.

I had one today but I think I will describe another encounter first. It was probably about a year ago. I was late night shopping with a friend when someone grabbed by arm and I was spun around a little by the force of it. I found myself face to face with the Relief Society President (I was one of her counsellors when I left). We each asked and answered those boring greetings and questions "Hello" and "how are you"... quickly followed by "have a nice night" and "good-bye". At the time I had found the encounter to be odd and a little unnecessary. I mean, if she had not grabbed my arm I would have walked right past her and never noticed. The paranoid me thought that maybe she was trying to confront me and make me face her. The more grounded me considered that she had been brave and caring in reaching out. She had seemed a little nervous and I think that I can safely say now that I think this was a positive encounter.

Especially when compared to the next two encounters.

The next one was at the shopping centre again. My daughter was browsing through purses when a member from our old Ward entered the store with a mobile phone to her ear and her face angled away from me. She went straight up to the service counter, took the phone away from her ear and started talking to the sales assistant. Okay, so paranoid me thought this was quite hilarious. It really did look like an elaborate (and woefully unsuccessful) attempt to go unnoticed. We had been browsing there for a while and I figured that this woman had decided she couldn't wait any longer and had to get into the store. Whatever.

Today I arrived at the High School I was going to teach at and the Relief Co-ordinator was showing me around the school. He went up to the ladies at the Library counter to have a little natter and then I realised that one of them was a member from my old Ward. This time I said with a smile "Hey, I know you! Hello _____ ". And she looked at me with expressionless eyes, said nothing and then looked away. LAME!

I'm starting to think that my old Ward really isn't that fond of me. I need a smart remark for next time, anyone got one?

Rally for Equal Marriage Rights - Perth, Western Australia 19/03/2011

When one of the Mo’ mums at my kids school asked me what we were going to do on the weekend I told her that we were going to the Rally for Equal Marriage Rights. There was some stunned silence before she managed to exclaim something about me fighting for the ‘other side’.  We talked about it for a little while. She is very happy to openly discuss things, which is great because although we disagree on a lot of issues I don’t feel like I have to hold anything back when I talk to her.

 I am not much of an expert on the plight of the LGBT community so I thought I’d just write down some of the things she said and then leave it up to more my savvy commenters to reply. I’ll add my thoughts too.

The first thing she asked was if I knew that if the LGBT community was given equal marriage rights then ‘it’ would have to be taught in schools, to kids as young as 5?

My thoughts – I just watched an episode of Glee the other night where being gay was spoken about very openly in and out of class. I know it is just TV and they didn’t mention marriage but I get the feeling that the world is pretty well prepared for their kids to talk about LGBT rights etc at school.  Also, if people are born with their own sexual orientation then wouldn’t it be imperative that they hear about the legitimacy of their feelings at school?!

Then she said that if same-sex couples were allowed to marry then paedophilia and bestiality would soon follow as accepted ‘lifestyle choices’.

Ugh! – So (some) opponents of same-sex marriage actually look at the love and devotion clearly displayed by consenting adults in a same-sex relationship as being ‘in the same boat as’ or 'close enough to' criminal behaviour.

My friend said, "soon religious people will lose all of their rights". I asked her what she was talking about. She said that she "wouldn’t be allowed to say that being gay is wrong."

Hmmm. I’m pretty sure freedom of speech won’t be taken away, but you might want to be careful where you say it, more for your own safety than anything. Believe what you want to believe, just stay out of other peoples' bedrooms and marriages!

One other thing she said was that it wasn’t right for 3% of the population to dictate to 97% of the population.

Well what ever happened to fighting for the little guy, the minorities? I also think that the 3% statistic is fairly useless since I wonder how many LGBT are openly gay? My spider senses tell me that the real figure is much higher… 

Gott ist tot

Hey, it's Maureen's DH!! and this being my first official post I'd like to state to the anonymous readers: I don't think you're all cowards, only if you seek to defame and slander under your anonymity; that is cowardly and holds no respect. Anyway I have been honoured with an invitation to post here at MBB, and I've accepted!

So, there we were, our 8yro daughter and I, in the dining-room and she asked a question apropos the Mad Hatter and his head twirling capabilities whilst he was futterwacken. Thereupon I explained and this conversation ensued:

'The Mad Hatter, darling, is a fictional character, just like in a cartoon they can make it look like his head is spinning; but it really isn't.'

'What's a "fictional character"?'

'Fictional characters are people, animals, things, that don't really exist; like Santa Claus.'

'Santa is real!'

'Well then, like the Easter Bunny.'

'Dad! the Easter Bunny is real as well.'

'OK, then like who?' I ask my knowledgeable daughter who is looking up at me, eyes full of retribution and scorn for proclaiming the myth, and she pauses to think, and looks away. Her gaze returns carrying in it's wake a glint and a grin.

'Like God?' She almost whispers.

'Well, yes.' I reply, proud and shocked. Previously all of my theological discussions with our little angel have been more along the lines of god's existence being up to the individual and if she wanted to believe in god that that would be OK with us. I continued 'Don't you believe in god any more?'

'Well, I did, but then we went to Scitech and they said that everything around us came from the sun. At church they told us that everything comes from god. So, I don't think that god is real.'

Our conversation continued of course but ended with the same sentiment: Gott ist tot.

God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?

—Nietzsche, The Gay Science, Section 125, tr. Walter Kaufmann

Or a more contemporary take:

God is dead,

and no one cares.

If there is a hell

I'll see you there.

—Nine Inch Nails, Heresy

Here's to our fictional characters (or should that be Fictional Characters?)

T.

The Age of Accountability

My daughter turns 8 this Saturday.

If we were still Mormon this would be a significant age, it would be time for her to be baptised........

Hmm.

I am so glad that we figured out that the whole religion thing is bullshit before she reached the age of 8. As her mother I am choosing to say NO to lessons (or songs) about the role of a woman as homemaker and baby machine. NO to being told that the husband should preside! Ew! seriously. NO to a Youth program where the girls activities are supervised by a male chaperone. NO to leaders adjusting the fit of her clothes and shaming her if her appearance is not saintly enough for them. NO to being told that how she dresses affects the self-control of boys!! NO to shame, guilt, fear, brainwashing, indoctrination and all the other bullshit that accompanies religion.

My daughter will make choices in her life that I will struggle with, I know that. There will be times (moments of weakness) when I will probably wonder if it would have been easier to raise her in the church.

Easier? maybe.

Better? never.

I want to do it the tough way. I want her to know deep in her core that she can question anybody and anything at anytime.

I love you my girl!