Showing posts with label thought crime. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thought crime. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

My interview with the Stake President

So I couldn't just leave this witty repartée to die in the mirky depths of commentdom... I have resurrected it and hope to breathe new life into it here with you. 




INTRO - In my post 'Big Love' I mentioned that it tends to irk me that some TBMs (True Believing Mormons) now view me as "...the devil's plaything..." here's what ensued in commentdom:




Stake Pres. said...


As a stake president I definitely consider you to be a plaything um I mean the devils plaything is what I meant not my own personal plaything or anything as that would be highly inappropriate for a stake president to desire you in such a fashion which obviously wouldn't be the case.


M said...



...



Stake Pres. - Sorry to tease you like that :P I really should watch my word choices around men who don't regularly 'take care of business' - my bad ;D (p.s. I need to make an appointment to discuss my relationship with my shower nozzle with you, can you fit me in this week?).



Stake Pres. said...





I always give top priority in my schedule to sisters who seem to have developed inappropriate relationships with plastic devices.

In order for them to overcome their weaknesses I encourage them to provide full and thorough accounts of their experiences.

This always includes any fantasies that they have (since we are judged on our thoughts as well as our actions).

Due to the urgent nature of this offense please come and see me tomorrow evening at my office, right after family home evening.



M said...




That suits me :) We'll be having Hot Mormon Muffins for the FHE treat so I'll be sure too bring some with me to our interview. Should I bring the shower nozzle with me for clarification? Oh, your place or mine?






Stake Pres. said...




Please do bring the offending shower nozzle. It may become useful as the interview unfolds. I look forward to our meeting at the stake centre. Being a Monday night we should be able to conduct the whole affair (for want of a better word) in complete privacy.








For more such shenanigans you can visit the Stake President's own blog :D