Saturday, April 30, 2011

Sexplorations



I have so many sexy things to share with you.


A couple of weeks ago I went to see The Vagina Monologues. I thought I would like it... and I did! I wasn't even uncomfortable although I thought I might be. Each monologue captured me and taught me something new. For those of you not on fb here is my status update from that night -


"So Maureen, how was the Vagina Monologues? ... Well, I learned that to love a vagina you must first love hair. I also learned that there are like a billion different ways to moan. A vagina can be very aptly compared to a heart. Oh, and I got to practice yelling "CUNT!" ... not bad for one night."


Last night I went to a community gathering organised by our local eco-faeries to listen to and ask questions of sexologist Claire Litton. I went there with 2 girlfriends and there were about 35-40 in attendance, most between the ages of about 25 and 40 and a whole lot of attractiveness to boot! You could feel the love in the room. Sexologist Claire even remarked at one point how our attention was easily lost in our apparent desire to be all hippy-love supportive of each other... big virtual hugs all round every time someone said something that resonated with someone else, which was like every freakin' time someone spoke! 


That night I learned that I'm not the only one who grew up with hang-ups about sex. The non-Mo' populace also often struggles with sexuality. Porn seemed to be a big topic. Mostly people were concerned about the negative impact that it can have on people. Sexologist Claire spoke about the pornification of our society. She said that many people are learning about sex through porn (particularly porn that is not femme friendly) rather than in sex-ed and that this is altering our sex lives somewhat. I was a bit confused, having recently delved into the world of porn I was starting to like what I saw but then I realised that I have been lucky enough to discover porn at a time when there is beginning to be a lot of feminist porn out there. I have been spoiled by Erika and Tristan. When I mentioned these film-makers to the room no-one (other that Claire) had heard of them. How weird that the least sexually experienced person in the room (taking wild liberties with my assumptions here) would have accessed the best porn of anyone in the room (more liberties). 


And probably the number one word for the night? Communication! yup, talking before, during and after sex is highly recommended. Sexy talk that is, not your shopping list ok!


Another hot tip for the night was a plug for the Genderfuck Ball in a couple of weeks.  From the ad - "Genderfuck ; (v) the self-conscious effort to “fuck with” or play with traditional notions of gender identity, gender roles, and gender presentation." Now the question, what to wear??? I can't wait!


I ran across this article about improving sex worker's rights. "The West Coast Co-operative of Sex Industry Professionals (WCCSIP) in Vancouver, Canada, is taking the safety of sex workers into its own hands, reports Joanna Chiu in HerizonsThe WCCSIP, made up of women, men, and trans-individuals, is one of several successful sex-worker organizations around the world. (In India, the group Durbar Mahila Samanwaya Committee has 65,000 members.) In an ambitious new proposal aimed to reduce violence against sex workers, the WCCSIP is lobbying to start a co-op brothel in Vancouver's Downtown Eastside. "


Oooh, and I 'liked' Susie Bright on fb. I'm a little star-struck by her I must admit. Her book Sexual State of the Union opened the door for me to a bright new world of sexual freedom. 


I should also probably mention that I was un-friended by another Mo' recently over my pro-porn attitude! Here's some excerpts from that illuminating conversation - 


In the anti-porn corner we have:


the original post - "To my parent friends out there thinking about taking your kids to see Easter Bunny movie "Hop" - you may want to rethink. The Easter Bunny goes to visit the Playboy mansion and speaks to Hugh Hefner. This is just one more way Playboy markets to children and grooms children to be future pornography consumers. Disgusting."


"but Porn is evil"


"well I'll be teaching my kids that all porn is bad... I don't know what good you are refering to. In my eyes porn is a mockery of the human body"







"And it is my personal opinion that there is nothing healthy about porn, or an entire industry that exploits vulnerable people."

"Smash 'em _________"

"just coz something is a way of life these days doesnt mean we need to accept it, or that it is right. The same can be said for drug alcohol abuse and related problems inc violence, bullying, paedophilia etc. They are all more common than ever, a way of life, but do we just accept them and say it's all good? I know my answer. Good work, _________!" 

...and in the Pro-Porn corner: 

"the Playboy franchise and porn are NOT one in the same. Playboy porn is only a style of porn. We musn't paint all forms with the same Playboy brush here"

"Oh come on, porn is not the enemy here. Once again, this uninformed assumption that all porn is the same and all porn is bad. Pornography is not just Hugh Hefner and his blond living dolls. Some is not good, some is exploitative, a lot isn't."

"what is wrong with being a future pornographer?"

"BTW check out kidsinmind.com when you want to know more about a movie - http://www.kids-in-mind.co
m/h/hop.htm"

and somewhere in the middle:

"Actually, Hugh Hefner was one of the founding influences in women's rights and largely funded the movement in early years. True, his financial support was selfish - so birth control would be introduced and abortion would be made legal, but . but regardless, we wouldnt be where we are as a gender without him. Women in modern times owe him a lot for our equality. Interesting twist, huh? ;) THAT'S the reason I own at least one piece of clothing with his bunny logo on it. Im in no danger of becoming a porn star, trust me....the reference to Hugh's financial contribution to women's rights is from a book called Female Chauvanist Pigs: The Rise of Raunch Culture."

......................

Well that ought to keep you busy for a while. I'll let you know how the ball goes. 

2 comments:

  1. I would really love to see the V Monologues; I've seen excerpts and loved them!

    Lack of real comprehensive education about sex, for young and old alike, is probably why people fixate on and condemn pornography in the first place. I don't get why people can't just see reality, that talking and learning about sex is good, that exploring to find out what you like isn't really harmful, and especially that pornography and erotica can play a positive role in a person's sexuality.

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  2. I am amazed at how much our sexuality factors into our lives! and just how much the previous 30 years spent being scared of my own sexuality really held me back. I am loving the new education that I am giving myself and I hope to play catch up really fast in order to help my kids out. It bothers me when I now come across factions out there who really demonise sex. I was unaware of just how scared people can be of their own and others sexuality.

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