Love Bombs in memory of Joseph Smith

Joseph Smith Jr. died on June 27, 1844.

I don't celebrate his death but I hear that in Utah (and other parts of the U.S.A.) June 27th is a day where it is hard to escape constant messages praising the man. Over here in Australia I am relatively sheltered from such messages but facebook does increase that phenomenon. This year a facebook event has been created encouraging ex-Mormons (and anyone else who would like to get involved) to Love Bomb facebook today with testimonies, quotes, videos and links sharing the truth about Mormon history.

The creator of this event states... "PLEASE do all of this with Love in your heart, and in appreciation that someone once took the time to share the truth with us, enabling us to now live Joyous, peaceful, and authentic lives."


Living in Australia also means that I get to be amongst the first share these posts. My first one was a link to an "I am an Ex-Mormon" Video  . Accompanying this video I wrote ... 


"RIP Joseph Smith Jr. (Died June 27, 1844) Even though I am very very mad at you I think maybe you were a bit screwed in the head and so I am trying to forgive you. Although I doubt there is a life after this one I do know that there is life after Mormonism ♥


...and now I realise how far I have come. I used to openly hate the man. I called him "bastard, scoundrel, villain, rogue, rascal, snake, jerk, swine, cad, knave.... " I regularly told him to "Fuck off" and so it was a welcome discovery today when I typed out RIP in front of his name... and actually meant it. Then I watched the youtube link of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing 'Praise to the Man' whilst doing some research for this post. Yes, some of the lyrics pissed me off but I felt moved by the music and even got a little teary. I think that I felt sad for the many people who have been hurt by Mormonism as well as thoughtful about the goodness that can spring from just about anywhere, even from a false prophet. I like the idea that I can enjoy listening to this song whilst disagreeing with the man and the religion. Progress? I think so. The people singing the song believe in Joseph as a prophet and they try to live good lives and to honour the good man that they think he was. Now, I may be on the path to forgiving the man but the things that he did and the people that he hurt are recorded in history and I will not forget their pain. 


A couple of things about that 'Praise to the Man' youtube video (if you decide to watch it or if you already know it). The line - "Praise to his mem'ry, he died as a martyr;" gets the goat of ex-Mo's not so much because he had a gun with him, not so much because he shot it into the mob but because he had practised polygamy, kept it a secret (even from the husbands of women he married) and then burned down a printing press that dared to write about the truth of Mormon polygamy. This is why he found himself in prison!!! Whilst he did not deserve to be killed by a mob he was no saint and the church absolutely white-washes the story. As a child I heard and read the Mormon version of events many times. I was lead to believe that he was unarmed and that he was in jail because the law of the 'Wild Frontier' deemed his religion to be a nuisance, i.e. they were being discriminated against. AND I was taught that he was shot inside the jail-room and that the force of the bullet forced him out of the window where he fell to his death. In fact he had tried to jump out of the window to escape and was shot trying to do so. Again, still a sad story and I pity him but not the version of events that I was taught in Sunday School. 


Another line - "Earth must atone for the blood of that man". Can anyone say 'Holy War'? Seriously don't go around saying shit like that! Someone might actually take you seriously and either start a Holy War on your behalf or against you. Either way I think the less people keen to throw us into some kind of thermo-nuclear armageddon the better!

Finally, did you see that final painting of Joseph Smith there in the video? Um, whilst I think Joseph might like this image of himself I don't think it is very realistic and uh, it kind of looks like the artist! Check out the jaw line, the artist seriously just painted a picture of Joseph Smith in his own likeness!

Aaaaaaanyhooo, I think that the idea behind this facebook event is a good one. Reading sickly sweet messages about a man who has had a negative impact on your life kinda tends to leave bile in your mouth so it helps to be able to respond with a Love Bomb. Check out LAM (Life After Mormonism) or the iamanexmormon website and rest assured that you are not alone!

Stress-Free Kids Party: The Ultimate Oxymoron

Easter kicked my butt.

My daughter's birthday was on Easter Sunday this year and she really wanted to have her party on the day; not a week before, not a week after, the real day!

So we planned it. We sent out invites 2 weeks before the big day to give people enough time to rsvp, figuring that we could always reschedule the party if people were going away for the holiday. Instead everyone bar one said that they could come! party on.

Then the day before the party we started getting calls and texts saying that such and such couldn't make it because they had some Easter do on. One parent even gave me a 'lecture' about how their child's birthday had been on Easter Sunday last year and how they couldn't have the party on that day because everyone is busy with their families on that day. I also had another person tell me that Easter Sunday is for families and that I really shouldn't plan a party for that day. What the...!

Well this was all news to me! As a Mormon I never noticed the Easter Sunday being any different than Good Friday, Easter Saturday or Easter Monday! Well, except for going to church but we did that every week. I had never experienced the Sunday as any different to the other 3 days. I never even knew which day to plant the easter eggs, I generally just picked a day that suited me best.

Hmmm. The morning of the party we had 2 more rsvp reversals and we were forced to reschedule the party. My daughter had a few tears (I had a few tears- thanks A for listening to me whinge!) and then we picked ourselves up and went ice-skating. It was invigorating and extremely enjoyable. (Next year I think we'll have the party there!).

So yeah... just when I thought I could live my atheistic life in peace Easter came and knocked me for 6.

Betrayal

Emma Smith and Eliza R. Snow were both 32 years of age when they became friends.

In 1835 Emma and Joseph invited Eliza to board with them while she taught a girls school. "Eliza was not fond of teaching school, but living in Emma's home offered a compensation: Eliza watched Joseph" (Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith, Tippetts and Avery, p. 61).

On March 17, 1842 the Female Relief Society of Nauvoo was formed with Emma Smith as president. Emma chose Elizabeth Ann and Sarah Cleveland as her counselors and Eliza as secretary.

On 29 June 1842 Eliza R. Snow and Joseph were married in secret. At the time Eliza was living with Sarah Cleveland. Sarah's husband, John Cleveland, was living several blocks away. It seems likely that Sarah was also married to Joseph by this time.

"Sarah and Eliza knew that Emma regarded them with respect and affection. While women who became Joseph's wives were able to accept the principle of plural marriage as a revelation from God, they still had to grapple silently and alone with their betrayal of Emma. To live as a secret wife to a friend's husband demanded evasion, subterfuge, and deception. For these sincerely devout and faithful women, their duplicity regarding Emma must have prompted guilt and anxiety." (Mormon Enigma:Emma Hale Smith, Newell and Avery p. 120).

Emma worked tirelessly to promote the church, nurture the people and notably to combat accusations of polygamous practices within the church. All the while the members of this group of women, this 'Relief Society', continued to marry Emma's husband in secret.

Louisa Beaman married Joseph April 5, 1841

Agnes Coolbrith Smith married Joseph before June 1842 (she was the widow of Joseph's brother, Don Carlos).

Sarah Cleveland married Joseph in 1842 (this date is not certain but the marriage is)

Elizabeth Durfee married Joseph before June 1842 (this date is not certain but the marriage is)

(The above 2 women were older women who were sometimes referred to as "Mothers in Israel", their job was to teach the younger women the principles of plural marriage).

These women all served in the Relief Society 'supporting' Emma as president whilst married to her husband! As well as these women who were married to Joseph, there were others in the organisation who knew of the plural marriages but kept the secret from Emma.

Joseph addressed the Relief Society on May 26 1842 "There is another error which opens a door for the adversary to enter. As females posses refined feelings and sensitiveness, they are also subject to an overmuch zeal which must ever prove dangerous, and cause them to be rigid in capacity. [You] should be arm'd with mercy notwithstanding the iniquity among us.... Put a double watch over the tongue...[You] should chasten and reprove and keep it all in silence, not even mention them again... One request to the Prest. and society, that you search yourselves--the tongue is an unruly member--hold your tongues about things of no moment. A little tale will set the world on fire. At this time the truth on the guilty should not be told openly--strange as this may seem, yet this is policy. We must use precaution in bringing sinners to justice lest in exposing these heinous sins, we draw the indignation of a gentile world upon us (and to their imagination justly, too). It is necessary to hold an influence in the world and thus to spare ourselves an extermination" Joseph contradicted his previous charge that the women watch over the morals of the community. Emma was doing her job too well. " (Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith, Tippetts and Avery, p.115).

Emma discovered Eliza's secret in early 1843. There is much folklore surrounding the discovery. Tales were told of Emma catching Joseph and Eliza in an embrace outside of his bedroom (Emma's room was on one side of Joseph's room, Eliza's was on the other!) and that Emma then flew into a fury and flung Eliza down the stairs. Some stories claim that Eliza was carrying Joseph's child at the time and miscarried as a result of the fall. Whatever the details it is certain that Emma would have been deeply hurt and shocked by the news.

Shame on the church for their treatment of Emma in their history. Shame on the church for their god-like portrayal of Joseph.

I know of members who believe that the practice of plural marriage was an awful, terrible mistake. They still choose to remain members of the church. They believe that Joseph made a mistake but that he was still a prophet who spoke to god and translated the Book of Mormon. I personally believe he was a complete fraud but my point here is that I hope that members of the church will at least look into the matter of plural marriage, not for my sake, god no, but for Emma and all of the women and men who suffered from the practice.

Lying by Omission

Of course the general membership know very little about Joseph Smith's 'harem', the church white-washes it's history.

Article about John Johnson's family. (the part I want to highlight begins with the paragraph "Records aren't complete" which is more than half way through the article).

"...when we examine the lives of the Johnson family, they reflect both the glory and the tragedy of these early Church experiences."

Was Marinda's life an example of the 'glory' or 'tragedy' side of things?

Compare the LDS (Mormon) article with this one.

The LDS article mentions that Orson Hyde was sent far from home on many missions. It mentions the difficult circumstances that Marinda was left in with her young children. It also mentions that Joseph Smith provided better living conditions for Marinda and her family.

What it doesn't mention is that while Orson was away on mission Joseph Smith married Marinda. It also doesn't mention that Orson later married extra wives and that in 1870 he and Marinda divorced.

The LDS article ends with this lovely statement:

"Marinda’s death ended the earthly career of the original John Johnson family, a family who left a lasting impression on the Church and all those who knew them. Like Lehi’s family, their disobedience resulted in unhappiness and tragedy, and their faithfulness resulted in the blessings and happiness of the gospel."

Hold on... I'm confused. Who ended up happy? and who got the rough end of the stick? The whole mess looks pretty miserable to me.

It seems to me that critics of the Mormon church aren't the only ones who don't include all relevant information..... "The problem is, critics of the LDS Church use scriptures selectively, and not fully, in their arguments, therefore their interpretations are faulty of what LDS teachings really are." Michael Fordham.

Let's just say that transparency is not really one of Mormonism's strong points. Lies, deception, white-washing, cover-ups... it's all there.

The Wives of Joseph Smith

The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith (part 2)

I read about the following information in this book:

Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith by Linda King Newell and Valeen Tippetts Avery (Doubleday, 1984).

It would appear that Joseph first introduced the subject of plural marriage through a revelation received near Jackson County, Missouri, on July 17, 1831. You can read it here.

Newell and Avery suggest that although Joseph seems to have believed that he was commanded by God to establish plural marriage he was not given specific instructions as to it's implementation. They go on to outline how this made things very difficult for Emma.

Mary Elizabeth Rollins married Joseph Smith in Feb of 1842 at the age of 24. Rollins recounts a conversation between herself and Joseph in 1831 when she was just 12 years old. She said Joseph "told me about his great vision concerning me. He said I was the first woman God commanded him to take as a plural wife." ( Mormon Enigma p.65. Mary Elizabeth Rollins Lightner to Emmeline B. Wells, summer 1905, LDS Archives).

Less than 6 months later Emma and Joseph moved into the John Johnson home. (See this post) Newell and Avery suggest that "Perhaps Joseph was not discreet in his discussions about plural marriage, because rumor and insinuation fed the fury of the mob that tarred and feathered him. When the Johnson boys joined the mob that entered their own home, they clearly suspected an improper association between Joseph and their sixteen-year-old sister, Nancy Marinda." (Mormon Enigma p. 65).

"William E. McLellin, a member of the Twelve wrote in an 1872 letter about an incident related to him by Frederick G. Williams in 1838. McLellin wrote that Joseph "committed an act with a Miss Hill--a hired girl" : near the time of Joseph III's birth. "Emma saw him and spoke to him... he desisted, but Mrs. Smith refused to be satisfied. [Joseph] called in Dr. Williams. O. Cowdery, and S. Rigdon to reconcile Emma. But she told them just as the circumstances took place. He found he was caught. He confessed humbly, and begged forgiveness. Emma and all forgave him. She told me this story was true". " (Mormon Enigma pp. 65-66).

Around the time of the birth of Emma's second son, Frederick, a similar incident occurred. Fanny Alger came to live with Emma and Joseph as a hired girl. She was 19 years old at the time. It is claimed that Joseph married Fanny in 1836. In an 1872 letter McLellin wrote that Emma noticed both Fanny and Joseph missing one night, and went to look for them. She "saw him and Fanny in the barn together alone. She looked through the crack and saw the transaction!!!" (Mormon Enigma p. 66). Newell and Avery further explain that "Joseph's theology may have allowed him to marry Fanny, but Emma was not ready to share her marriage with another woman. When Fanny's pregnancy became obvious, Emma forced her to leave." (Mormon Enigma p. 66).

The incident drove a serious wedge between Oliver Cowdery and Joseph. Oliver wrote to his brother "When [Joseph] was here we had some conversation in which in every instance I did not fail to affirm that what I had said was strictly true. A dirty nasty, filthy affair of his and Fanny Alger's was talked over in which I strictly declared that I had never deviated from the truth in the matter... just before leaving, he wanted to drop every past thing, in which had been a difficulty or a difference--he called witnesses to the fact, he gave me his hand in their presence". (Mormon Enigma p. 66).

Ugh!!!

So, here is just the tip of the iceberg. I feel sick. Can you imagine Emma hugely pregnant, then going through labour, recovering, looking after a newborn... meanwhile Joseph is off with some teenager!

Did Joseph come up with an ingenious way to satisfy his sexual desires? A theology including plural marriage. No adultery, they were married, how very legal and happy for everyone!

And the mens club!! let's shake hands and be friends again. Never mind the deplorable way we treat our women, us men can rise above the muck!

Tell me your thoughts people. What is your reaction? Do you want to spit chips like me? Do you feel incensed? or can you accept it?

For Emma

Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith, Linda King Newell and Valeen Tippetts Avery.

After more than a year of research into all things Mormon the above book is the one that sealed the deal for me in relation to leaving the church.

No Man Knows My History: the life of Joseph Smith, Fawn M. Brodie.

I read Brodie's book after I was clear of the religion. It was an enthralling read. However it looks as though Mormon apologists have some concerns over some of her sources so I will be more cautious when I reference her in the future. There is plenty in Mormon Enigma and other books anyway so I still have many things that I want to post here. I feel I owe it to Emma somehow.

The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith

Joseph Smith married Emma Hale on January 18, 1827.

On the night of March 24, 1832 Joseph was dragged from bed by an angry mob. They stripped, scratched and beat him and then smeared his bleeding body with tar. They then ripped open a pillow and plastered him with feathers. They attempted to choke him and to pour poison down his throat.

Many Mormons will have heard this much of the story and ascribed the mobs anger to religious differences (as well as economic factors) . There may be more to the story.

It is written that Eli Johnson demanded that Joseph be castrated. (The evidence for the existence of an Eli Johnson is tentative. Brodie referenced a late source for this. However there are other sources that describe the motivation of the mob, I have posted about them here.) "Dr Dennison had been employed to perform a surgical operation, but he declined when the time came to operate" (Journal of Discourses, Vol. XI pp.3-4).

Eli Johnston (it would be more correct here to say the Johnson boys, John Johnson's sons) suspected Joseph of improper relations with his sister Nancy Marinda Johnson (or Marinda Nancy Johnson) who was 17 years old at the time.

Nancy became Joseph's plural wife in April 1942.

Nancy bore two sons whilst in Nauvoo. It is possible that Joseph Smith was their father.

(I read about these things in Fawn M. Brodie's 'No Man Knows My History: The Life of Joseph Smith'. See pp. 119, 462-464. You can find her sources therein.)

I believe it is a lie

Just a quick one from me today. A few people have said to me that they thought I had left the church for reasons such as being lazy or wanting to sin e.g. drink alcohol, dress sexy and swear like a trooper. Some people have also said things that lead me to believe that I have been unclear about why I left the church.

I left because...

I believe that Joseph Smith lied about the golden plates and angels visiting him. I believe that he wrote the Book of Mormon himself (how? who knows, I am not trying to explain my reasons here I am just stating them, I will explain in the future). I believe that Joseph made up all of his 'revelations'.

A few facts admitted by the church itself:

He married other women without his wife's knowledge. He married women who already had husbands, he sent the husbands off on missions and then had them approve of his own marriage to their spouse (already a done deal) when they returned home. He married young girls, yes even young for the 1830s. He promised Emma (his first wife) that he would stop practicing plural marriage and then he carried on with it behind her back.

Is that enough? well there is more but I would like to get to that in due time.

I did not leave the church to be 'naughty', I left because I believe "with every fibre of my being" (a common phrase in Mormon testimony bearing) that it is all a damned lie!

Ignition

(Note to active Mormon members, I will say things here that you won't like)

I was an active Mormon 100% devoted to my calling with the Young Women, 100% converted to the doctrine. I gave talks in front of the entire congregation bearing witness to the things I believed were true. So what changed? Did I read anti-Mormon literature? Did I give up and say it's all just too hard? Did I crave 'worldly things'? No, No and No. I'll tell you what happened. I read the Book of Mormon. Faithfully reading from my scriptures I came to the second chapter in Jacob for the nth time in my life but this time I noticed something that I hadn't before. Here are verses 27-30, v30 is where I stopped short:

27 Wherefore, my brethren, hear me, and hearken to the word of the Lord: For there shall not any man among you have save it be one wife; and concubines he shall have none;

28 For I, the Lord God, delight in the chastity of women. And whoredoms are an abomination before me; thus saith the Lord of Hosts.

29 Wherefore, this people shall keep my commandments, saith the Lord of Hosts, or cursed be the land for their sakes.

30 For if I will, saith the Lord of Hosts, raise up seed unto me, I will command my people; otherwise they shall hearken unto these things.

Here I realised that God was saying He might implement plural marriage at some future time. I had never noticed that before (must have been very sleepy those other times I read it). I cross-referenced this with 'revelations' in Joseph Smiths Doctrine and Covenants. You can read section 132 here. It outlines the 'New and Everlasting Covenant' including the plurality of wives. What I read there curdled my blood. Here are verses 54-56 (I have marked some words in bold type) :

54 And I command mine handmaid, Emma Smith, to abide and cleave unto my servant Joseph, and to none else. But if she will not abide this commandment she shall be destroyed, saith the Lord; for I am the Lord thy God, and will destroy her if she abide not in my law.

55 But if she will not abide this commandment, then shall my servant Joseph do all things for her, even as he hath said; and I will bless him and multiply him and give unto him an hundredfold in this world, of fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, houses and lands, wives and children, and crowns of eternal lives in the eternal worlds.

56 And again, verily I say, let mine handmaid forgive my servant Joseph his trespasses; and then shall she be forgiven her trespasses, wherein she has trespassed against me; and I, the Lord thy God, will bless her, and multiply her, and make her heart to rejoice.

Ok so I left the church about 5 months ago so bear with me here... here's my current response to this 'revelation' - FUCK OFF!!!!

I will give more evidence in future posts but for now suffice it to say that after more than a year of research I believe that Joseph Smith wrote this 'revelation' from his own philandering heart and mind (or should I say penis!). Whatever his delusions of grandeur were this step places him squarely in the realm of bastard, scoundrel, villain, rogue, rascal, snake, jerk, swine, cad, knave.... take your pick.

Note the highlighted section. For several hours I believed that God would destroy me if I would not accept plural marriage in the future. During this time I felt the greatest pain that I have ever felt in my life. I appeared that God did not love me as much as he did my husband, or any man for that matter. I was a 'thing', property to be traded and used. It hurt. Just remembering that experience now makes my heart race and my stomach turn. Again, after 12+ months of sorting through all of this crap I can say FUCK OFF!!! FUCK OFF!!! FUCK OFF !!! to Joe Smith and his accomplices.

I will fill in the gaps in future posts but this was the ignition of my new life.

A Time to Purge

Over the past 10 years or so I have collected a lot of pictures, games, stories about Mormon beliefs etc and cut, pasted, laminated and filed them away. They have occupied a large shelf in my living room for me to reach into for 'Family Home Evening'. (We have kept this tradition but now call it 'Family Night' and there's a lot more games and a lot less religion).

Last week I spent about 2 hours sorting through these materials. I was not prepared for the emotional battle which ensued. As I threw more and more pictures and stories into the bin I began to feel a sense of loss. Some of these pictures were just beautiful and I felt sad when I threw them away. I particularly felt conflicted when I came across pictures of Nephi and other Book of Mormon Prophets whom I had loved as close friends since childhood. I felt angry. It is not Nephis fault that such deception has been shamelessly used to blind millions of people. Then I decided that since Nephi is a fictional character... just like Margaret Hale, Jane Eyre and Mr Darcy, Nephi could continue to hold a dear place in my heart. I kept his pictures!

The next unexpected feeling was when I came across a picture of Joseph Smith and I had a 'flutter of feeling', not of the religious kind but of the womb kind. Ah! Quick, in the bin! I think I'll just file that feeling away and pull it out whenever I need a good chuckle.

Once I was finished and stepped away to look at the rather bare but neat, clean non-Mormon shelf I felt refreshed, purged even. The pictures of the Temple have been taken down. One small framed picture of Jesus still remains in the kitchen. I'm not sure what how long I'll keep it, he doesn't look too happy these days. I haven't made up my mind on Jesus yet. JS has been monopolising my time so far, I'll get to Jesus soon.